Almost exactly 8 years ago (November 2017), I was diagnosed with Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease, which was most likely to develop into Lupus.
I met Dr. Barbhaiya in her office at HSS' Main Campus and remember just how scary of an appointment it was for me. Rheumatology is mysterious, subtle in symptom, and from what I understood one of the more difficult fields to find a really excellent doctor in. I had my dad with me that day and didn't know what to expect but I did know something weird was happening in my body. Dr. Barbhaiya and Dr. Lockshin took an intake of my symptoms and performed a standard exam on me but what stood out was the care and attention Dr. Barbhaiya put into my appointment. I joke and say that she touched my hand, touched my foot, asked about my job and truly took her time to discuss what was happening with me.
I never understood what it meant to treat the patient and not the disease but I felt privileged to have time to grow a working relationship rooted in trust and care with her as my doctor. As a previous elite athlete, I have understood the dynamic of what it means to be on a team. The easiest way for me to get through some of these more difficult moments when it came to my health has been to remind myself that Dr. Barbhaiya is the captain on this team, I am in the net as the keeper and the other doctors she pulls in is another member on our team. My family and friends are either on the field with us, or they are in the crowd supporting but everyone has a role to play and each person is necessary and critical in a must-win game. I think the most important part to remember is that the captain position isn't just given to the person with the most experience, but the person who has the trust of the team and in this case has earned the trust of me so that we can attack challenging situations together with a plan that makes sense.
When my health took a turn, Dr. Barbhaiya was right there to refer a dermatologist that she trusted to join our team. After about 4 years of monitoring my (what eventually did turn into) Lupus, Dr. Barbhaiya recommended we get a nephrologist just in case because you don't want to have to find one when you are in a crisis. She recommended an incredible nephrologist who knew how to speak to me, made me feel seen and made me feel safe. Unfortunately I did end up in a serious situation where I eventually did need that nephrologist, but he was ready for me, knew my charts and helped me feel more comfortable going into a serious and scary situation which ended up dramatically improving my kidney results.
Every 6 months I see Dr. Barbhaiya. She has my most recent labs, is up to date, and I feel like she has given real thought to my chart. It's the type of care that makes me feel so lucky to have been in an unlucky situation, and to have found someone who really is invested in my wellbeing. As I get older, I am acutely aware that everyone deserves the care that Dr. Barbhaiya gives me and not everyone is lucky enough to get it. Both of my best friends are nurses and they have come individually to appointments with me to HSS. As I travel quite a bit for work, I had to make an especially long trip to come back for my doctor's appointment and brought one of my nurse friends with me. After meeting Dr. Barbhaiya, she said she understood why I would fly around the world to see her and dramatically recommended that if I needed to do it twice, that I should because she is a one of a kind doctor.
Simply put, Dr. Barbhaiya is an absolutely brilliant doctor. There is really nothing else I need to say but I could continue to fill pages of just how wonderful she is and somehow think it still would not do her justice. She is the type of doctor that works well with other doctors, shows extreme care for her patients, and sees you as truly human in some of the scariest situations you can be in. It is the type of kindness and consideration that everyone would only wish to have in a vulnerable moment with their loved ones. I am truly indebted in the care and consideration that Dr. Barbhaiya has shown me and continues to show me. Thank you to HSS, Crystal, and Drs. Lockshin and Barbhaiya, and the team at the Barbara Volcker Center for Women and Rheumatic Diseases. You guys have changed my life and I am so glad to be on the up and up because of it!
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